encouraging · faith · Family · motivating · self-love · Uncategorized

Mood swing

Over the past several weeks I’ve been struggling with stress and just feeling so busy. My week days have been so long and it has made it hard to balance work life and home life. I know so many can attest to what I am talking about. There doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to everything we need to do. Some times it can last a short few days and then others it seems never ending. I would like to say I have found some great wisdoms to pass along and then share that with you. The truth is I haven’t any wisdom and very little advice.

Sometimes the advice I do have doesn’t even work for these seasons. My advice would be;

Try to think about the positive and look for the bright side

Keep moving forward and chipping away at what’s ahead

Look at how much you’ve been able to accomplish before in these seasons

So on and so forth can be the advice. Here is my honest opinion about these situations; very rarely are there bad days but mostly bad moods. That is true for most of the times I go through these things. If I just swing my mood then my day miraculously gets better. This is what happened to me two weeks ago. My mood was crummy and I wasn’t looking to change it. I was kind of wallowing in my own bad mood. I bet if we were all honest we can admit to doing this sometimes. It was a Sunday and I was dreading my upcoming week. I was letting it seep into my favorite day of the week and ruin my family time. I wasn’t outwardly doing anything to ruin it I should say but I wasn’t doing much to help spread fun. I think the truth is though sometimes we don’t do anything and God still shows up to help us out. That was what happened to me this particular day. I suddenly felt like this was what would carry me through my long week. The feeling I had, the moments I lived in, and the time I took would help me feel loved and refuel me for the things that were ahead.

So many times over the last few weeks I have gone back to that Sunday in my head or just looking at the photos I took that day of my family and I feel happy and full again. Even now it makes me smile. I don’t want this to seem like another advice blog or that I think you should be doing things differently with your life. I simply want to share this with you because I hope that maybe you will have this shift in your mood and see God shows up even if you haven’t asked Him and it can change everything.

faith · Family · grief · motivating · Redirection · self-love · Uncategorized

2017, the year of change

Like most people I’ve been reflecting today on what 2017 has meant to me and what I am looking for in 2018. In the past I would try to set goals for the upcoming year and in recent years I would pick a focus word. For 2017 I didn’t do that exactly but one was picked for me, change. This year I saw so much change in my life in every aspect. My relationship with family members, my husband and son, my career, friends, and my relationships with God.

Some people do not like change and I have to admit it scares me at times. I’ve become comfortable with the familiar and I think that becomes even more true the older I get. When things are going well change can be scary because that means they could become bad with everything turned upside down. That’s what freaks me out about change. What I am learning though is with faith in God change doesn’t have to be as scary. We still may worry and cry but we shouldn’t be fearful. If we believe God knows what is best for us then we have to trust in His will. I think this is when change becomes growth and I feel I have grown spiritually so much more than I expected this year. I am so thankful for where God has brought me and where He intends on taking me. It’s a little scary but not like it was.

Because of all this, because I see that I cannot know what the future holds for me I am not looking for what 2018 means for me but rather what I feel God is saying about 2018 for me. I feel a pull towards the word ‘others’. I don’t know why or what it will mean but I’m sure I’ll find out. Thank you God for such an amazing year of blessings.

faith · motivating · self-love · Uncategorized

Blessing/Worry

I come from a long line of worries. We are the best at over analyzing until whatever we started thinking about now become something so different it’s almost unrecognizable to our original thought. This can sometimes be a good quality, the ability to think of different ways to prepare or correct situations. However, it can also lead to unnecessary sadness, hurt feelings, and wasted time.

Several years ago I realized I didn’t want to continue this way. It wasn’t good for me and I wanted to stop. I prayed about it and began to find it was less about me stopping the worrying but more about turning it over to God. I don’t think that you should “let go and let God” like the saying goes but what I mean is we should pray to God about our feelings and then ask Him to reveal how we fit in the situation. Is it something we can help with, something we should do to change, or maybe we should take a step back from it altogether? Even now I have to remind myself of these things.

I believe the other half of this coin is enjoying the good stuff. This, as bizarre as it may sound, is the harder part for me to get right now. I don’t know if it comes from my history of worrying or just human nature to expect bad things but I struggle sometimes with waiting for the storm to hit. I think about how blessed I am and wonder when something will dramatically turn bad. To me this is a terrible way to live though. As if God only allows a certain number of good times then followed by bad. I feel like it’s not living through God’s blessings.

Throughout the Bible we are taught that God wants to bless us and wants great things for our lives. God wants good things for our lives. So why do we struggle sometimes to see that? I believe it comes from many different reasons. Maybe someone told you that you don’t deserve it or it’s just been one struggle after another. Regardless of the reason, I feel we need to recognize God’s blessing. For me that means praying when things look tough but looking at the other areas in my life that are going so well. Looking for the ways God is working to improve the hard parts. It means finding joy even when things are hard. It can be hard to make this change and it’s easy to become discouraged but I believe it’s easier the more you do it and it really makes a difference in your everyday life. Life is more than just a series of repeated ups and downs. I want to encourage you to give God your worry and to live like you’re loved because you truly.

encouraging · faith · motivating · self-love · Uncategorized

Overwhelmed no more

I’ve had the word overwhelmed on my mind here lately. I just decided to check it in my dictionary app and I was a little surprised by the results found. 1 to overcome completely in mind or feeling: overwhelmed by remorse.

2 to overpower or overcome, especially with superior forces; destroy; crush: Roman troops were overwhelmed by barbarians.

3 to cover or bury beneath a mass of something, as floodwaters, debris, or an avalanche; submerge: Lava from erupting Vesuvius overwhelmed the city of Pompeii.

4 to load, heap, treat, or address with an overpowering or excessive amount of anything: a child overwhelmed with presents; to overwhelm someone with questions.

5 to overthrow.

All of these meanings are from a negative viewpoint. I have reread them now several times over and cannot find a positive outlook anyway. This is completely different from the way I have recently viewed this word overwhelm.

About two or so months back I was so busy with things to do, things that I wasn’t exactly happy to be doing, and missing some of the things I wanted to do. I felt defeated and overwhelmed. Then I began to think about how I got into that season of my life. I had been praying for a long while for God to help me in specific areas of my life. I realized He had answered. Although it didn’t look the way I thought it would. These changes were hard and I hadn’t expected that when I had prayed for change.

We ask for blessings in our lives. We’ll pray for growth, chances to help others, ways to make real differences in our communities but when the multiple opportunities arrive we can feel overwhelmed by them. We may miss them because we view them in a negative way. We think it’s something to trip us up or slow is down so we try by passing them. I know I have done that so many times. But didn’t we just ask to be blessed? It’s harder when answered look like more questions.

I’m not going to lie, I am still struggling with this. I’ll have breakfasts to get ready, lunches to pack, beds to make, work my full time job, be a wife and mom. There are dishes and laundry, dogs, and the list can go on…but what if I didn’t have these little blessing. My life may be less hectic but a lot less meaningful and joyful. God has blessed me beyond anything I could have ever hoped, dreamed, or imagined. One morning I was trying to get through my morning routine and I had the though “I’m just here to make the beds huh? And do the laundry? And all the other things no one wants to do?” But then I though no, I am here everyday making the bed as a blessing and an opportunity to make my home better for my family and not just another overwhelming task. Opportunity rather than overwhelming. I feel this has cleared up some mental clutter for me with fewer negative thoughts and feelings. I hope you too will switch the word overwhelming out with something more positive that fits better into your life.

faith · motivating · self-love · Uncategorized

belated birthday reflection

I turned 30 recently. I know traditionally this is a milestone that freaks people out. It is weird thinking about being out of my 20’s and moving into a new age bracket. I have to say though, I wasn’t upset about turning 30. It made me feel easy and peaceful transitioning into my next phase. When I reflect upon my 20, especially early 20’s, it seemed chaotic at times. I guess a lot of people feel that way. It’s a time of freedom, adventure, and having experiences. I didn’t feel that way about it though. I sort of felt out of place. I wasn’t running wild like a lot of the others my age but I was trying to. Only it didn’t fit me. I’ve always kind of felt like I didn’t know who I was and that was always kind of challenging for me because I didn’t feel completely comfortable in who I was trying to be. I felt like I could adapt to be a 100 different people. If you ever struggled with personal identity you know what I’m talking about. I didn’t like it because I wasn’t building a solid foundation of who I was completely. I had my moral values sure but I didn’t see that was enough at the time.

Through the latter part of my 20’s I desired to grow spiritually. Through prayer and faith built friendships I started feeling stronger. This is when I felt the pull to start asking how God saw me rather than others do or even myself. Since then I’ve learned that my morals were the foundation of me all along but I couldn’t see that at the time.

I’m not regretful for my 20’s because I learned some major life lessons. I think being so adaptable was necessary to learn for my future self. I can honestly say I’ve been using it a lot recently with all the changes going on in my life. And it’s wonderful. I have had actual aha moments that I recognized a new step in my spiritual journey.

I’ve learned so much from just opening up to the process and looking at myself and the world around me differently. Perspective, I think that’s my biggest take away so far in both the major life events and the mundane everyday happenings.

I’m so thankful for my journey thus far and am feeling blessed about the future come what may. 30 looks bright from where I’m standing.

encouraging · motivating · Redirection · self-love · Uncategorized

Striving for Patience

IMG_4080Hello friend. I hope this week has found you well. Since my last post about being spiritually fed, I was able to reset my direction and be more intentional with listening to sermons. One of the themes that stood out to me is patience.

I hate to admit this but I have a short temper sometimes. This is one of the faults I am working on. I have noticed a direct relation between my little patience and my quick temper. I never recognized it before but I had the realization that if I am not exhibiting patience then I become more upset with little things happening around me. Then I started thinking more about how I could be more patience. So far what I’ve come up with is expect interruptions and use forethought. Since becoming a mom I’ve learned being prepared is my best strategy. I figured out if I started prepping for the next morning the night before, my morning wouldn’t be as hectic. If I knew I wanted to leave the house as soon as my son was up from his nap I should pack the car before he wakes up to make it an easier exit.

I never thought about applying these techniques when thinking about my emotions. As I thought about this concept I thought “well isn’t dealing with interruptions just another way of multitasking?” Which I believe it is. To me the difference between multitasking and dealing with interruptions is this; multitasking is orchestrating multiple things around you and interruptions are when things are happing to you. So I allowed interruptions around me to happened to me rather than me being an active part in the process. I was so focused on moving forward with my plan that I would become frustrated and stuck if something seemed to interrupt me. One of my favorite sermons to go along with this is by Holly Furtick called “The Gift of Interruption” . In that she tells the story of the good Samaritan and how he allowed an interruption in his day and was able to help out his fellow man. It makes me think about how many times I may be able to positively impact someone else day, maybe even my own, if I allow for interruptions.

This brings me to my next point, forethought. No matter how much planning I do I know that things will not go 100% my way and that interruptions will occur. For me though this is where things get a little tricky. I feel like there is a difference because forethought and worrying. To me worry is when you repeatedly think about something in a negative way and forethought is thinking about something in a constructive way. So by utilizing forethought I am able to equip myself with different responses to interruptions. Forethought is just a fancy word for preparation and that for me has become a vital part in dealing with interruptions. Shifting my perspective from dealing with interruptions verses preparing for different situations can help my mood be in the better frame of mind.

I am learning very slowly how to build my patience. Some days I feel like I am taking steps back though. I feel guilty or even defeated on those days. I wonder why I’m not getting it together. Those days are hard. I am learning to work through this and I feel like am learning each day. Holly says we women are the thermostats for our family meaning we set the tone for how the rest of the family is feeling. I believe this is true and I want to set a realistic prospect of a joyful family. I am going to continue to strive for patience.

faith · motivating · self-love · Uncategorized

staying spiritually fed

Happy Sunday! Sunday is my favorite day of the week. I feel like it’s still the weekend as well as the beginning of the week. To me it’s a day dedicated to family time. I just love Sunday. Most people think of church for Sunday and while it is true a lot of religions celebrate church on Sunday I feel like it shouldn’t be dedicated to just one day, at least not for me.

Over the years I have noticed that my mood is directly related to how I am feeling spiritually. I am referred to being spiritually fed. If I haven’t been taking time to be spiritually fed I just feel crummy. However, also in reverse of that, I tend to manage my days better when I am activity seeking God in my daily life. Knowing how to make my day smoother, you would think I would be 100% consistent with my spiritual walk but I am not. Like you, I am human and not perfect.  I make an effort for sure but sometimes I allow the things going on in my life sort of take over and before I realize it I am having a bad mood.

It took a long time to realize that a deeper connection with God was what I needed and looking for. I grew up going to church and it meant something very special to me. I didn’t realize how important it was until I moved away for college and no longer had it though. I felt lost. I struggled to find a place over the next several years that gave me that same connection I once had. I was spiritually hungry. I moved around from church to church but none seemed to fit. And it wasn’t just the churches but the groups offered or the classes. I was sad to think I couldn’t have that anymore. I stopped going for a while because it was too exhausting to figure it out. Then I met one of my best friends and tried her church. That was the catalysis for finding my way back to the relationship I had once had with God. I started by getting back into listening to sermons online, and reading my bible and joined a study group. I was happier than I had been in a very long time. I had joy and I was being fed.

Worship music has played a big part in my life as well. I’ve grown up listening to the old  hymns and I seem to still remember the words. I love listen to Christian metal and rock music too. Listening to worship music helps get my day moving in the right direction. I find something so powerful in music that allows me to release and really experience what I have going on in my life. The best part, it’s so easy to do.

Matthew 6:33 says “Seek the kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.” This has been so true for me. I have had some tough things happen in my life but above all things I feel so blessed. I know my faith in God is what keeps me going. For me I know in order to feel grounded and have joy I need to feel spiritually full.  I want to encourage you not only today but everyday to do something that brings you joy and helps you feel happy. Something that helps you connect in a positive way with the world around you. Do something that makes your heart and spirit feel full. Sunday’s are my favorite day of the week and I try to have a little Sunday in everyday.